I grew up eating iceberg lettuce. And then more iceberg lettuce. I thought iceberg and fruit were the only salads you could eat. Good thing I was wrong.

iceberg

(Actually, I wasn't unhappy with iceberg lettuce salads. When your base ingredient sucks, you just add a bunch of cheese, bacon, ranch dressing, and tomatoes. But then, why are you even eating the lettuce at all?)

You all know this, but I'm going to say it anyway. There are much better green things to eat. Green things that are so good by themselves that you don't need cheese or ranch or bacon. They are spinach, arugula, dandelion greens, radicchio, and chard. In order:

spinach arugula dandelion greens radicchio chard

Again, limited experience here. The consumption process:

  1. Buy.
  2. Clean.
  3. Optionally add a vinaigrette or eggs or pasta or whatever.
  4. NOM crunch NOM crunch NOM.

You're happy, full of delicious green things! Now you can eat your giant cheeseburger without feeling guilty!